March 17, 2021

“Am I Doing This Right?” Learning How To Meditate with Lisa Erickson

“Am I Doing This Right?” Learning How To Meditate with Lisa Erickson

I sat down with to Lisa Erickson to talk all about the art of Meditation. She’s an author, energy worker and meditation teacher. She shares how to get started with meditation, how to do it, and we talk about the many different types of meditations and how to find the one that’s right for you.

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[00:00:00] Lola: [00:00:00] Thank you so much for taking the time to do this interview. It was, really interesting because I came across you and I'm learning about meditating and stuff like that. So, I was like, Oh, this would be really interesting to talk to her about. 

[00:00:15] Lisa: [00:00:15] Good, perfect. 

[00:00:16] Lola: [00:00:16] Hey y'all, Welcome to the Awkward Mom Stage podcast, a podcast where Lola, that's me, a millennial mom, talks to friends about life, motherhood, and everything in between. Every Wednesday

[00:00:27] I bring you topics that we all struggle with, whether we're a parent or not. Every stage of motherhood is awkward. Whether you have one kid or six, you're a dog mom, or you feel like your partner's mom, things can get messy. I'm for sure an awkward mom, navigating all the growing pains that come along with millennial mom life. Feel stuck in an identity crisis?

[00:00:48] Feel like your life lacks direction? Goals feel distant? Well, you're not alone. Tune in every Wednesday as I go through the crazy coaster called life with you. This podcast celebrates motherhood in all [00:01:00] forms for exactly what it is, awkward. I'm your host, Lola Nicole. Grab yourself, a glass of water or wine, whichever suits your day and get ready because the awkward mom stage starts

[00:01:11] now!

[00:01:23] What better introduction to an episode about meditation than the birds?  These bad boys are awake early. Okay. I hear them all day, all night. So, it's literally like a never-ending meditation sequence for me outside. Hey y'all and welcome back to the podcast. If you're new here. Hi. Hello. Welcome to the awkward mom stage.

[00:01:48] If you're coming back for another episode, thank you so much for your support. If you're loving the podcast, please don't forget to leave me a review so others can find me and join the TAMS crew. [00:02:00] Today I'm sitting down with Lisa Erickson, she's an energy worker and a meditation teacher. She works a lot, especially with mindfulness around parenting, healing, sexual trauma, and helping women break through barriers to their own power

[00:02:14] and self-beliefs that are holding them back from stepping out into the world the way they were meant to do. She started meditation while still in the corporate world, and after having kids migrated into her new career. She has 15 years’ experience, so I'm so excited to sit down with an expert to help teach us some new pointers on meditation.

[00:02:33] So we can all get in tune with our minds, bodies and souls together. So, let's jump into this episode. So, I always do like an introduction on my podcast to share my guests, but I always like for them to  tell everyone who they are and what they do and  how you got started. 

[00:02:51]   Lisa: [00:02:52] My name is Lisa Erickson and I call myself an energy worker and a meditation teacher.

[00:02:58] I say energy worker because a [00:03:00] lot of the meditation techniques and healing techniques that I work with use the chakras. Which are energy centers  aligned along our spine that we can focus on. That's not the only kind of meditation that I work with, but it's one of the main ones. And I especially work a lot with women because I work a lot with mindfulness around parenting and also healing from different kinds of trauma, especially sexual trauma, and also helping women break through barriers to their own power, like their own self beliefs that are holding them back from

[00:03:34] stepping out into the world  in the way that they're meant to do so that's kind of me. And I got into this work through my own. I was in business and in technology for many years, and I was having a lot of stress, physical issues, headaches, and stomach aches. And that's how I originally got into meditation.

[00:03:52] It  turned into a spiritual path from there. And then I started studying energy healing. And eventually after I had [00:04:00] kids started migrating my career. And now I've been doing this for about 15 years. 

[00:04:04] Lola: [00:04:04] Oh, wow. Okay. That's awesome. It's like energy work and meditation separate. Are they one in the same?

[00:04:13] Lisa: [00:04:13] It can be both. Sometimes they're one in the same and sometimes they're separate. So, there's a lot of kinds of meditation. And I think for basic stress management, which is really probably the most common reason people initially turned to meditation. The one of the most common forms is just focusing on your breath and just sitting for a few minutes a day.

[00:04:34] Really just focusing on the feeling of the breath going in and out of your body, perhaps elongating the exhale because that actually triggers a relaxation response. And just your mind on the wander, your mind will go all over, but you pull, you just keep pulling your mind back. And that is really like a meditation pushup.

[00:04:53] And the more you do that, you are training your mind to know how pull yourself back when [00:05:00] you're out in your day and you're stressed out and you start getting worked up. You're training yourself, how to pull your mind away from those overwhelming emotions. So that's  basic meditation then chakra meditation, instead of just focusing on your breath, you're focusing on a particular part of your body.

[00:05:16] And either visualizing light. They're like I'm going here because this is  a common one. The heart chakra energy center here, or the third eye up here, you're either visualizing light there. You might be doing a chanting like oohhmmm or another  mantra or seed syllable to help some people use music.

[00:05:37] And you're visualizing, you're activating this energy center here or whichever energy center you're working with. Each one is associated with certain emotions and energies that you're trying to feel more of. So then in the kind of work I do, there's also distance healing like Reiki. You may have heard of Reiki.

[00:05:55] This is when someone else is channeling energy into you. So, I  do that, but [00:06:00] I also guide people through chakra meditation, where they're learning to activate their own energy centers. They're not just receiving it from me as a healer. So, when they're doing  that's really meditation. That's really guided meditation.

[00:06:12] So that's how they all  intersect. That was a lot. I know to throw at you all at once. 

[00:06:17] Lola: [00:06:17] Guided 

[00:06:17] meditation is  what I do, because like I use the insight timer app and there's  and stuff on there. Is that what guided meditation is when someone talking you through the meditation? 

[00:06:29] Lisa: [00:06:29] Exactly.

[00:06:30] And they might be using a visual, like sometimes they're guiding you through a visualization. Sometimes they're guiding you through focusing on your breath, focusing on a chakra. There's a lot of different things you could focus on in a meditation, depending on what it is that you're working with.

[00:06:45] If you're working with anxiety or you're trying to feel more empowered  different meditations help with different things. 

[00:06:55] Lola: [00:06:55] What do you think the best way for someone that cause  for me, it's really [00:07:00] hard for me to focus like. In quiet. I feel like when it's quiet, then that's when my mind races the most.

[00:07:07] So for someone that has a hard time focusing and  being still and quiet, what would you suggest to them in starting to meditate? 

[00:07:15] Lisa: [00:07:15] Yeah 

[00:07:15] And this is really common.  This is what most many people find either when they start to meditate. Either they fall asleep or they get really busy. It's  we tend to be one or the other, some people just go right to sleep and some people, their mind gets even busier.

[00:07:30] So you're trying to find this middle place. I find for people who tend towards getting really busy, sometimes the more active meditation to start is actually good. So,  there's walking meditation.  Yoga is a kind of moving meditation because as you're moving through the poses  you're trying to just focus on your body, not thinking.

[00:07:51] So sometimes yoga is an entry point into meditation because you're moving as you do it. But if you want a formal sitting [00:08:00] meditation, you could try mantra meditation, which is when you're like repeating a phrase over and over. And there's different versions of that. Or I find chakra meditation  really good for that because you usually have a visual, like you're visualizing a color light in this chakra for a while, and maybe you're doing affirmations with it too.

[00:08:20] Like I am calm and you try to feel that I'm peaceful and then each time your mind wanders, you come back. You say that affirmation again, you focus again. So, there's a little bit more activity to it.  Sometimes for breath-based meditation, people will advise counting. So, count 10 breaths forward, and then 10 breaths back 10, nine, eight, seven.

[00:08:43] And that counting gives your mind something to do. So basically, it's about, it's experimenting with different meditations to find which one keeps you the most engaged, but also accepting that your mind will wander and that's normal. [00:09:00] It doesn't mean that you're a bad meditator. It, what counts is every time you pull your mind back, not that your mind wanders, but that each time you pull it back, that is a pushup.

[00:09:09] And  that's what you're trying  to strengthen. Is that part of your mind that pulls you back. 

[00:09:14] Lola: [00:09:14] Yeah, I think that's what I'm always like, Oh, I'm doing this wrong. I'm terrible at this because,  yeah. Totally not.  I'm not doing it right. But it's good to know that like mind wandering is  a part of it. 

[00:09:27] Lisa: [00:09:27] Yeah, it's like exercise.

[00:09:29] Lola: [00:09:29] Okay. 

[00:09:29] Lisa: [00:09:29] Yeah.  Like if, when you first start out in the gym, you can only do two pushups. That doesn't mean you're bad at pushups. It means  you have to do more pushups and a few months from now, you'll be able to do more than two, right? It's the same with meditation. People need to give themselves time.

[00:09:44] It's a process. No one just sits down and stills their mind.  

[00:09:47] Lola: [00:09:47] With meditating and energy work. How would one start with choosing which one is right for them? Would they just kind of do one or the other? 

[00:09:57] Lisa: [00:09:57] I think experimenting is [00:10:00] really good.  The insight timer app is a good one because it has different voices and different meditations.

[00:10:06] Cause that's another thing with guided meditation. Sometimes one person's voice or style will resonate with you and another person won't.  Then you can also seek out  if you have a specific goal  okay, the reason I need to meditate, meditate is stress is getting the better of me, right?

[00:10:22] If that is your goal, stress management, then you can specifically focus on meditations that are for that. Insomnia is another one. There are meditations that are specifically for insomnia, helping you get to sleep right. Then some of the chakra work I do, it's more around those empowerments    okay.

[00:10:41] I  in my career, I'm trying to make a new jump and I'm just overwhelmed with fear or self-doubt. And I'm trying to break through that. Then you might want to do meditations that are more focused on empowerment  and letting go of self-beliefs.  [00:11:00] Oldest self-beliefs that I do a lot of trauma healing  so some people are specifically looking for meditation.

[00:11:06] That's going to help support  healing from different traumatic events in their life. So, you can look these different things up and experiment with different meditations, depending on what your goal is. And some people are spiritual that's then for some people it's tied to their spiritual faith. So, there are meditations that are    from a spiritual leader that aligns with their beliefs or something like that.

[00:11:31] Lola: [00:11:31] Okay. So, with trauma work, how would someone come about working with you? How do they first begin in working through that trauma? 

[00:11:42] Lisa: [00:11:42] Yeah,  I do both classes and private session work.  One-on-one by phone resume or classes, a lot of classes. So, a lot of people come through those. I have a book that's called chakra empowerment for women that is going through all the chakras and its really women's empowerment, but every [00:12:00] section had, every chapter has one section on how that particular chakra or energy center

[00:12:05] might be impacted by trauma.    Feelings of unworthiness in the heart are linked to the heart chakra, right? Feelings of self-blame or guilt are linked to a particular chakra feeling of, I can't own my power,  that  or being passive, being afraid to speak up could be work. We're working on the throat chakra.

[00:12:25] So that's  the work that I do. So, some people, it would be more. From that book or a class that they take or private session work. 

[00:12:33] Lola: [00:12:33] Okay. 

[00:12:33] If someone’s brand new to energy work and they're trying to figure out what's right for them, how would you best describe it to them to  steer them in the right direction?

[00:12:43] Lisa: [00:12:43] Yeah,  I have two approaches sometimes I just say, just try it, just let me guide you through. And then try to sit home on your own and see if you start to feel it, because sometimes all the describing it, all the intellectual stuff can scare people, right?  Oh, I don't really understand what you [00:13:00] mean and you don't actually have to understand it to feel it right?

[00:13:04] It's like you don't, it's again, using the exercise model  to learn, to do pushups or to run  you don't have to understand the anatomy of every muscle and bone in your body.  You just need someone to tell you, do it like this, keep your shoulders over your elbow  all that kind of stuff.

[00:13:20] So the most common one, I would start with this, the heart center. And I would ask someone and anyone listening to lung can try to, if they want  just think of someone, perhaps a child or a pet. That you just really love in a very uncomplicated way.  So not our messy relationships, just like someone we just love in a really uncomplicated way.

[00:13:44] And usually when you do that, you'll feel like a warmth in your heart. Like you want to hug them to you,  even when you see like a cute puppy video, maybe some people might feel that,  this, that actually is that warmth is your heart chakra.  And even if people don't feel it right away, if they do that [00:14:00] for a few days, they usually do.

[00:14:01] And then you try to just focus on magnifying that warmth without the thought of the person, the child, or the pet or whatever. And that is a very entry-level heart chakra meditation. And as you're doing that, you're just releasing these endorphins and these, this energy into your body.  So that, that's how it would often just start with people,  not even getting into the theory, but the theory really is it's simple.

[00:14:27] We have an energy body just like we have a physical body and cultures all around the world have mapped this.  Literally all around the world, they don't all use the exact same terms. But there really isn't  an area of the world where there aren't there isn't energy healing or mappings of our energy body.

[00:14:45] And so you're connecting just with a really ancient, universal knowledge  when you engage with these mappings. 

[00:14:53] Lola: [00:14:53] Okay. 

[00:14:55] Hey, y'all it's Lola here, host and producer of the awkward mom stage [00:15:00] podcast. And let me tell you, hosting and producing this podcast is not easy. I had no idea what I was doing and I still  don't tell anyone, but I don't. Buzzsprout has definitely been there to help me along the way from hosting to helpful videos on what to do, how to edit, where to go, how to get music, you name it,

[00:15:22] they let me know how to do it. And their Facebook community is even more helpful. So, let me tell you now, if you are a podcaster or you're trying to start a podcast or you have a podcast and you're looking for a host, definitely check out Buzzsprout. They've got everything you need to get started. Even a domain name

[00:15:39] if you don't already have one. Trust me, I'm no tech genius. And Buzzsprout has definitely been my saving grace. So, if you're interested, you can definitely click the link in the show notes and it will take you to Buzzsprout and they will walk you through everything you need on getting your podcast up, running and ready to [00:16:00] go.

[00:16:00] Now, back to the show. Do you feel like manifestation and meditation  go hand in hand it's both and not one or the other? 

[00:16:11] Lisa: [00:16:11] You definitely can use meditation for that. Meditation can definitely be a very helpful part of trying to manifest something in your life, because we often talk about in manifesting this idea.

[00:16:21] Like you have to be able to feel as if you already have what you want,  that if you're just focusing on what you want. Then the emotion you're feeling and the energy you're putting out is I don't have that. I don't have it. I don't have it.  Or maybe I don't deserve it, or I could never have that.

[00:16:37] Or I'm not capable of that.  Whatever fears are in there.  So, meditation can help in two ways. One is it can help you by slowing down, see those thoughts and let them go.  Oh, wow. There, I was just thinking about how impossible this is for two straight minutes. I'm going to let that go.

[00:16:54] So meditation helps you train your mind to let go of those old tapes, right? Then [00:17:00] it helps you. You can do certain meditation forms where you're specifically using affirmations and chakra work to empower the new state. Like for example, the Naval energy center is linked to self-confidence. So, if a big issue is lack of self-confidence, I would have someone focusing on their Naval chakra alike, a lot, letting go of the doubtful thoughts and really

[00:17:25] affirming daily, I am confident.  I'm good at what I do. And I'd probably make it more specific, like to what they were trying to do.  The other thing that it helps with that is trying to really like, if you are manifesting in your safe, visualizing what you want, this business that you want, or this new relationship, or you're trying to move, so whatever it is, right.

[00:17:46] Visualizing really flush out that visual and identify the energies that you'll feel like when you have that  what do you really want? We'll say, Oh, I need more money. Okay. But when you get that money, how will it make you feel? [00:18:00] You'll feel more relaxed, more secure. Like you can  do more things that bring you happiness  what is it?

[00:18:08] So name those things. And what often do is have people give each of them a color light, and then imagine that light coming into you now. Cause that's what you really want. Not the money, the feelings, the money is going to bring into your life of security.  And so, you focus on that. So, the, yeah, that was a lot to throw at you, but that's all the different ways that I would use different kinds of meditation to support manifesting.

[00:18:32] Lola: [00:18:32] Okay. 

[00:18:35] What would you say to someone that has a more negative mindset and they're trying to  step out of that mindset and they're trying to use meditation as a way to  pull themselves out of it. What tips would you give them in  trying to break through that? 

[00:18:54] Lisa: [00:18:54] Yeah  really identify what is the root of those negative patterns.

[00:18:58] If it's really  [00:19:00]pervasive, like it's really hard to get out of. There is usually something in someone's past that has imprinted that in there, right? It's either someone else's voice,  or parent or family members. And it's someone else's voice that as a young child got imprinted or it's the result of trauma or abuse.

[00:19:20] Or a failure, a big event in someone's life that just, they felt like they failed. So, they just lost all their confidence and they're stuck in that place of blame. So, you have to go back and do some healing around how it got there. Then once you've done some healing and that could be counseling, that could be energy healing.

[00:19:39] That could be a lot of different things,  that could be  a spiritual guide help you.  A lot of different ways to heal,  then from that place once you've really faced how it got there, the negative imprints, it's about vigilance and that's where meditation helps you. You just keep day after day, every time those thoughts [00:20:00] come in and you recognize them, you push them away and you say the opposite right now.

[00:20:04] I do deserve this. I am a good person.  You do whatever you need to replace it with. You just do it over and over. Sometimes you won't catch yourself for days. You'll get in a funk for days, right? And you're like, Oh, I just spent five days like that. And then you just pick yourself up. And then what happens is you just start catching yourself sooner.

[00:20:22] You catch yourself. After three days, you catch yourself. After one day, you catch yourself after three hours, you catch yourself after one hour. Eventually when those negative thoughts are rising, you're catching them as they happen. And you're like, no. But it does take some, it takes practice and vigilance.

[00:20:37] It takes the healing of the original imprint and how that got there. And then it takes vigilance for a while. And then eventually you're like, oh gosh, I haven't thought that thought for like months.    That's how it happens. 

[00:20:51] Lola: [00:20:51] Okay. 

[00:20:55] So you would say that like sometimes therapy would be [00:21:00] needed

[00:21:00] alongside meditation? That also meditation, isn't a way to not have to go to therapy basically? 

[00:21:07] Lisa: [00:21:07] For 

[00:21:07] most people. No, it really depends on what someone's dealing with. I think it's very individual what works for someone and the combination of treatments that's going to work. So certainly, I know people that have healed even from very serious trauma without therapy, but they usually had multiple things they were doing.

[00:21:24] Maybe they were working with  an energy healer and a biofeedback person  or a somatic healing is big in trauma healing because trauma stored in our body. Most people with very serious trauma, in some point in their life, they do have some sort of counseling or therapy. I think it's just very individual.

[00:21:43] And then the meditation is a great compliment to that because it gives you tools to use in the moment.  You're you really learn how to push away the, or let go of the thoughts and emotions that don't serve you. 

[00:21:57] Lola: [00:21:57] Okay. Is there like a [00:22:00] time when stepping away from meditation is a good idea?  If someone's just  I'm not getting this, it's not working for me.

[00:22:08] Like when should I take a break or? 

[00:22:11] Lisa: [00:22:11] Absolutely.  If some, if someone's actually starting to feel bad about themselves or they feel as if meditation is triggering,  they sit down and all of a sudden, they're having flashbacks or something like that. That's a sign that  you stop, you don't push your way through that.

[00:22:26] That's usually your mind telling you,  your being telling you  it's time to face this stuff and you need some support. And that's when you do need to be working with someone,  and then usually you might return to meditation at another time, or you need another form of meditation.  You need a meditation, that's more active.

[00:22:45] And that is what's going to work for you, for sure. 

[00:22:48] Lola: [00:22:48] I think active or somewhat active meditation is good for me because it's hard for me. I always catch my mind either wandering or like you said, sometimes I'll drift off when it's   wait. No, that's not what [00:23:00] I was here for. So, I try and do my meditation in the morning and I do maybe like a 10, 15-minute meditation.

[00:23:08] But while I'm listening to the meditation, sometimes I'm doing something else. Like washing my face or like getting ready. Is that also  can you meditate that way? Is that still meditating? 

[00:23:21] Lisa: [00:23:21] It is in the sense that you're connecting your mind with something else, other than your busy, normal thoughts, which is really the main activity of meditation,  so I think it's a gateway in, and it's what works for you, right? So, you have to honor what works for you. If after doing that, you feel better than something is happening, right? And then maybe down the road, you're going to feel like you want to do a more formal sitting meditation that's going to feel helpful to you.

[00:23:47] Maybe not. Yeah. So, you really have to honor and not have kind of any rules around it. I think, especially when starting out. And I think it also changes at different points in your life.  Depending on what's [00:24:00] going on in your life.  And we have phases where we're more contemplative and we have phases where we're just really active.

[00:24:05] When my kids were young, I had meditated for a long time before I had kids. And when my kids were young, it had to get a lot shorter. And there'd be times that I'm meditating and there's kids running around and now they're teenagers. So, I have more time for myself. So, it's become more contemplative and spiritual, but it goes through different phases in our life.

[00:24:24] Lola: [00:24:24] Yeah. Right now, my kids are really young, but my youngest is still  really dependent because she's six. So, I have to  I usually do my meditating first thing in the morning, like when I get up before they wake up. Cause that's the only time that it's going to be silent until bedtime.

[00:24:41] So I'm like, all right  10-minute meditation in the morning. That's what we got for today. 

[00:24:46] Lisa: [00:24:46] Great.  The reality is most moms  can't even get that. So that's fantastic. You've carved out that, that time and that's what we have to do.   Now I'm on the other end, they're teenagers and it's  I'm trying to pry them out of their room to see if they're still alive because [00:25:00] they've got their headphones in.

[00:25:02] So I'm on the whole other end of the spectrum. 

[00:25:07] Lola: [00:25:07] What are some steps that you feel someone should take when they're trying to first start out with meditating, where would they first look to  an app or a website? 

[00:25:18] Lisa: [00:25:18] I think these days, yes, the apps. There's the insight one you mentioned and there's another one, which is escaping my mind, but  people will find it in the app store.

[00:25:26] Can you remember what the name is? 

[00:25:28] Lola: [00:25:28] Headspace? 

[00:25:28] Is  that the app? 

[00:25:29] Lisa: [00:25:29] It's Headspace yes, yeah. That has a lot of different ones and there are websites or books. So, I think it's a matter of exploring and seeing what resonates with you to start.  There are also meditation classes, so depending on where someone lives and now a lot of those are obviously being done by zoom and things like that.

[00:25:47] So it is a matter of experimenting, but maybe first really identifying what is the main reason I'm meditating. There could be multiple reasons. But if  it's stress management, then you're going to want to start your search along those lines. If  [00:26:00]it's healing from trauma, put that in your search,  if it's spiritual, put that in your search, it may be multiple, but give yourself an access point.  What's the main thing I'm trying to accomplish right now, if it's manifesting? So that you're looking through the ones that are your options that are the most relevant to what your initial goal is. And I do think meditation changes for most people over time, but you start with that first 

[00:26:25] seat.

[00:26:26] Lola: [00:26:26] Okay. What does refuel mean? Cause I've heard that within meditating, what does that mean? 

[00:26:32] Lisa: [00:26:32] To me, it's really finding a meditation form where you feel like it is energizing you not draining you, at least part of the time.  It does feel like work part of the time because you have to keep pulling your mind back.

[00:26:44] But you want to feel as if afterwards at some level, most of the time, maybe not every day, but most of the time you feel more energized after you feel in some way more connected to your true source of energy.  [00:27:00]Which is really inside of us, not outside of us. So  that's what refueling really means to me.

[00:27:08] Lola: [00:27:08] And when people say, Oh, you're feeling energy. Cause I know. Me and some friends were like, okay,  what does that?  What feeling are we supposed to be feeling? Does everyone feel the same feeling or is there an aha moment where it's like, ah, I've got this or is it just  different for everyone?

[00:27:25] And it just  feels different for 

[00:27:26] everyone? 

[00:27:27] Lisa: [00:27:27] I think it does feel different for everyone and it also progresses. So, it's not about  just finding one state that you return to over and over,  it's progressed through your whole life.  It's I think never ending what you can unfold within you.

[00:27:40] From my perspective, because I'm a chakra geek and I love thinking of everything in terms of the chakras. I think. The reason people experience it differently is it's  like we each have a different energy profile. So, someone might be a real heart person that's well-developed in them. So, the first thing they're going to feel is maybe peace in the center of their body here, [00:28:00] but someone who's real physical, who's a real exerciser.

[00:28:02] They might feel it as  an almost full body energization.  Someone who's very intuitive might really feel something up here or they might see light. And it isn't, that one is better than the other. It really is just individual proclivities, but over time you can open up all of them if you're interested.

[00:28:22] That's the, we could say the spiritual journey for someone if they're interested. 

[00:28:27] Lola: [00:28:27] Okay. What do you feel the best meditation is for someone that's trying to get out of their own head to  clear their mind a little bit? Maybe they have  a project coming up or they're trying to  regroup.

[00:28:41] What do you feel like the best sort of meditation is for that? 

[00:28:45] Lisa: [00:28:45] I like basic breath-based meditation because it's so simple  that you can, anywhere you are just do focus on even just 10 breaths of just breathing in and out and the rise and fall of your belly or the [00:29:00] sensation of the breath, just going in and out of your nose, or mouth.

[00:29:02] This is like the basics. And we know that it has, like when they do biological studies, they hook people up to nodes. It has a centering and calming effect.  But then of course I'm partial to shocker meditation. So, if someone is interested in that, I feel it has a lot of power because you can pick almost what energy do I need most right now.

[00:29:24] Like I'm feeling really frenetic up here. I'm going to pull my energy down and focus on some of those lower chakras to get myself back in my body and connected to sensations around me.  Another good one for that is sense meditation, which is like just sitting for a minute and going, what is every sound that I hear?

[00:29:47] And so you force yourself to turn  your mind from all the busy thoughts to, Oh, okay. There's a car going by. There's a dog barked down the street. Oh, I can hear the word, the fan in the background. Oh, there was just a bird that chirp, like all of a [00:30:00] sudden you realize there's all these things you didn't hear, but doing that pulls your mind away from

[00:30:06] you know the chatter. So that's another centering calming, but because it's active, it can sometimes be easier to do. And you do it with colors too. What's every color I see?  But sound is often a good one. 

[00:30:17] Lola: [00:30:17] Okay. 

[00:30:20] Do you see a lot of child meditation? I know for me; we have  this thing where we'll have our six-year-old if she's getting like too hyperactive or she's too upset about something.

[00:30:31] We'll do them. One, two, three, breathe movement and breathing in, breathe out, and then she calms down and then we talk about it. Do you see a lot of child meditation?  Even 

[00:30:41] more? 

[00:30:41] Lisa: [00:30:41] I don't but I wish I did. No.  That's fantastic. Yeah. And you know what? It is getting more common. There are some school systems that are teaching it and child therapists they're teaching it.

[00:30:52] But I feel as if  that basic technique, that should be something every child learns. So, they go into adulthood. [00:31:00] With a tool they can use in the moment when they're, that's a stress management tool,  it's basic breathing tool. So, I think that is wonderful. I think there is a growing awareness around it for children and that would be fantastic.

[00:31:14] Lola: [00:31:14] Awesome. Yeah. It was just something I think I was like, no, I need to take a breather. And I'm like  maybe you should take a breather too. And then we just  started doing it. So that's  helped calm her down. So, I was always. Curious,  do other people like meditate with their kids? I know like kids do like yoga and all that stuff.

[00:31:32] So I would assume there's, I'm sure somewhere there's chill, meditating and doing well at it because they definitely have their minds going a mile a minute. So, if you can get them to calm down and pay attention and focus, then that's great. 

[00:31:49] Lisa: [00:31:49] And  it's a skill they can use their whole life.  And it's also, the kids are really open and fluid, especially at that age at six.   They'll try anything. So that really is the age to introduce these kinds of [00:32:00] tools. 

[00:32:03] Lola: [00:32:03] What do you think is the best advice for staying consistent with meditating? If someone's trying to implement that in their daily lives, what's the best way to make sure you're consistent?

[00:32:14] Lisa: [00:32:14] Yeah.  There's a lot of research on how to develop a new habit and that applies to meditation or other things. And really there's two things that are the most important, routine and reward. So, making it as routine as possible, meaning meditating if possible, at the same time, every day. In the same location, if possible, having a dedicated space, not on your bed or a chair where you also study.

[00:32:41] But even if it's just a little corner where that's the only thing you do because our body and our psyche take cues from our environment. So, it's like you get into bed, the cue is sleep. You sit down at your desk, the queue is work, right? So, you want a corner where over time, the cue for your body is meditate.

[00:32:57]   So finding [00:33:00] a place like that. And then putting some pictures or a candle or something there, again, creating a cue for yourself for your psyche.  Oh, this is a diff this is a different place. And it's not a picture of your family. Like a picture of a beach, a picture of one of your favorite places.  A favorite vacation spot with no people in it, something like that.

[00:33:20] That is just sending this psychological cue to your psyche. Okay. We're taking a break right now from our life.  If you're doing that sitting formal meditation, then  reward is really powerful. We are creatures that respond to punishment and reward.    It sounds silly, but like linking after your meditation, allowing yourself something you enjoy    a piece of chocolate  it sounds silly, but, or you save your coffee for right after that, or you really love  a certain facial cream or something

[00:33:54] and you love putting that on your face. You start doing it just after your meditation. He just finds some way [00:34:00] to link it, because again, it's creating this subconscious link of  Oh, I do this. And then I get that. And then eventually you don't have to have that routine anymore, but your psyche is associating meditation with something positive.

[00:34:15] And these are true for any kind of habit creation. And they say  really most habits take eight to twelve weeks to develop. To the point where it gets automatic.  So, if you're like, okay, the next 12 weeks, I'm going to really try to do this every day or whatever your goal is. I'm going to try to do this three times a week for 12 weeks in the same place.

[00:34:33] At the same time with this little reward in general, at the end of those three months, it will be automatic. 

[00:34:39] Lola: [00:34:39] Okay. If there's challenges with meditation. How would someone work through, is that when they would  go to a teacher or a coach? 

[00:34:49] Lisa: [00:34:49] Yeah, it depends what the challenge is. Some challenges you can just ride them out or change sometimes experimenting with changing the meditation that you're doing can [00:35:00] help.

[00:35:00] But if it is something like flashbacks or  really strong emotions or something like that. Yeah. That's when you would want to seek out support, because it really means in a way it's a sign something's loosening inside of you that maybe has been pushed down for a long time. And now it's ready to heal.

[00:35:19] So then I would definitely seek support if it's just  like you go for a week and your meditations are very busy, then I would just be like, okay, maybe I need to change my meditation. Let me look for another guided meditation or do something different for a while and see if that reengages my attention.

[00:35:35] Lola: [00:35:35] Okay. 

[00:35:36] And there's actual scientific benefits to meditating, right? That's a scientifically proven thing. 

[00:35:44] Lisa: [00:35:44] Yeah. Yeah. They have done a lot of research on meditation and really it pains management, stress management, anxiety, lowering blood pressure. If someone has a regular practice, it does do that. And the reason [00:36:00] when they've studied the reason for it, it triggers the relaxation response eventually where your body  we don't take time out.

[00:36:07] So it triggers the opposite of stress response, where we create adrenaline and cortisol in our body with whenever we feel stressed, relaxation actually lowers the production of those and creates endorphins in our body. Now that might only happen for one minute out of a 20-minute meditation, but what they're discovering is even that one minute is really good for you.

[00:36:29] And most of the studies do orient around a practice that is 20 minutes or so a day. So, it can take time to get to that point. Okay. But there are studies that even link just taking these breath breaks, where you just breathe 10 breaths, elongating your exhale, that it lowers your stress point. So that's  a couple of minutes.

[00:36:51] So I think anything is beneficial. 

[00:36:53] Lola: [00:36:53] Okay. 

[00:36:56] What are three goals that someone should focus on [00:37:00] when meditating? 

[00:37:01] Lisa: [00:37:01] While they're meditating or to set up their practice? 

[00:37:03] More so to set up their practice and  get into the groove of 

[00:37:07] meditation. Yeah. So, I think these, this stuff around this research around creating a new habit is really the most important.

[00:37:14] So really setting a goal that's first of all, that's realistic. I didn't mention that because sometimes people will be like, okay, think tomorrow I'm going to meditate an hour a day and  set a goal. That's  yeah. Okay. Unrealistic for your life.  So, if it's 10 minutes a day or 10 minutes every other day, or 10 minutes, Monday, Wednesday, Saturday, like really look at your schedule.

[00:37:35] Okay. I don't have a carpool this day, so I could do it that, okay. It looks like Monday, Wednesday, Saturday, I can do it.  Really being realistic. I'm going to start meditating 10 minutes a day, Monday, Wednesday, and Saturday, making a chart for yourself or doing it in your phone to actually. And then doing this other stuff like that.

[00:37:52] Creating a space in your house that is just for that or corner and putting a pretty picture there. And [00:38:00] then this reward deciding how am I going to reward myself for this to keep myself going? I think those are the most important things. 

[00:38:07] Lola: [00:38:07] Okay, so you don't 

[00:38:08] necessarily have to meditate every single day then?

[00:38:12] Lisa: [00:38:12] No.  In terms of developing no  in terms of developing a habit, okay. The research does show. It is easier if you're doing something every day. Whether even if it's a little bit, because that your body, we're very humans are very routine creatures. So, when it's built in like that, but you don't have to do that.

[00:38:30] No. And you're going to get benefit from doing it two or three times a week, but in terms of it becoming a long-term part of your life, Regularity is key. So, it is helpful to really be like Monday, Wednesday, Saturday. These are my meditation days.  Because then it's in your mind and you're more likely to stick with it.

[00:38:48] Lola: [00:38:48] Okay. 

[00:38:51] Wow. It's like really good information. Cause I felt like I was like, I am terrible at meditating. I'm never going to; I'm never going to get this. I'm not going to get to that [00:39:00] special place that everyone else gets to with the energy and the light that they feel. Cause I don't feel any of that. I just keep hearing myself think when I'm trying to be quiet.

[00:39:10] So that's what I've really been focusing on is trying to quiet my own mind so that I can get to the meditation. 

[00:39:19] Lisa: [00:39:19] Yep. 

[00:39:20] Exactly. And that has huge benefits because you're pulling your mind back from your training, your mind to pull it back.  And that's really everything what's so interesting is in some of these studies around like lowering blood pressure, that they would give one group medication and another group, they would have them meditate every day for three months.

[00:39:39] And they had the same amount of lowering of their blood pressure for the group that was doing the meditation as the treatment. It didn't matter whether they enjoyed meditation or didn't enjoy it, they got the same benefits. So, in that sense, it's really is like exercise. You don't, if you have a bad meditation or you don't like it every day, that doesn't mean it

[00:39:59] isn't doing [00:40:00] you some good, cause you're still pulling your mind back. And that really is a kind of mental exercise. Now, hopefully I hope everyone finds a form of meditation that they actually do enjoy at least most of the time, but someone shouldn't get up after a really busy day and feel like that was a total waste of my time, because it never is just the intention alone.

[00:40:19] And you pulled your mind back once out of the 10 minutes. That's one more time than you would have. It always is worth something it's like taking, they'll tell you with exercise, right? A 10-minute walk is better than no exercise at all, all week, right? So, you do what you can do and you honor yourself or whatever you're able to do.

[00:40:36] Lola: [00:40:36] Yeah. I saw Netflix has Headspace meditations. Now there's  eight Headspace meditations on there and I watched them and I was like, Oh, this is actually  interesting because it. For the longest, I thought that you had to meditate like with your eyes closed and all of that, but in those, they  tell you  can like, there's like a little orange ball in there [00:41:00] and you can  focus on that or just focus on something else.

[00:41:03] And I'm like, Oh, that, that kind of makes it easier. So, I don't know what it is, but like sometimes the closing of my eyes, even though I know there's nothing going on around me really, I'm just like  I can't do it. I can't keep my eyes closed. Do you hear that? 

[00:41:16] Lisa: [00:41:16] I do hear it a lot  and again, we have different personality types, so you're a doer, right?

[00:41:21] And then also when we have kids, they've actually done studies on moms, brains, how our brains change. After we have kids, there is a shift that occurs in our brains that is like constantly monitoring the household and what's going on. And  what is that sound I just heard three rooms over, did someone drop something?

[00:41:40] Why did he get so quiet? What's going on?  A part of our brain is always doing that. And that is hard to shut down.  And you can eventually, but it's important. I mentioned it only cause it's like important to understand having a busy mind, there's a reason for it.  And in some ways, it can be a gift.

[00:41:56] It's part of your, who you are. And a lot of good things [00:42:00] come out of it. So now you're just trying to gain control over it that you also have the option to slow it down when you need to. But it's not like it's all bad, 

[00:42:09] right? 

[00:42:09] Lola: [00:42:09] Yeah, absolutely. This has been so interesting learning all about meditation because I've just had so many questions, like, how am I doing this?

[00:42:19]   And then I would ask my friends and they'd be like, girl, I don't know because I don't know if I'm  doing it right. So, I'm sure they'll be happy to know that we, there are many other different types of meditation. I didn't realize that there were so many different ways for someone to meditate, especially for someone who has a mind that just can't

[00:42:40] sit still, they're still like a meditation for them. So that's good to know. 

[00:42:45] Lisa: [00:42:45] Absolutely. There's all different forms and everyone can find a form that is going to work for them. 

[00:42:53] Lola: [00:42:53] I'm sure everyone would like to know where they can find you and learn more about meditation and [00:43:00] trauma healing, even, especially the moms that listen, because

[00:43:04] even birth and everything else is traumatic. So, I'm sure that is another way that they can  release anything that they are thinking or feeling. So where can everyone  find you and learn more about your work? 

[00:43:19] Lisa: [00:43:19] Yeah.  The main, my book website is chakra empowerment for women, which is  a mouthful.

[00:43:24] I know, but your chakra is spelled C H a K R an empowerment for women, and then I'm on Instagram and Facebook as chakra empowerment. So just take off the for women, but you can find that might be easier if you're on Facebook or Instagram, go to chakra empowerment, and you can link through to the website from there, or I'm on Twitter as mommy mystic cause that, and that's also the name of my blog.

[00:43:46] Mommy mystic. 

[00:43:47] Lola: [00:43:47] Awesome. 

[00:43:48] Lisa: [00:43:48] Yeah. And then I have another website that's for private sessions. That's enlightened energetics, but they're all hooked to each other. So, if you find one, you'll get to everywhere else. 

[00:43:56] Lola: [00:43:56] Okay. And I'll put it all in the show notes, so everyone can definitely [00:44:00] find you. And do you have any, like any projects in the works or any new  clientele?

[00:44:06] Lisa: [00:44:06] I do have some workshops coming up, the chakra empowerment for women  book. I teach a three-month course associated with it and I'm in the middle of one right now. So, the next round of that won't start till later on in the year, but I have a lot of one day workshops. So, I have one coming up in April that is  trauma, just at one morning, two or three hours.

[00:44:26] I have one that is perimenopause and menopause because that's another big thing I work with for women in their forties and fifties. I periodically do one specifically on motherhood, managing energy. I don't have that one scheduled right now. I'll probably do it in May. So, people can, I do a lot of work with business.

[00:44:42] I do like energy work for business and manifesting in business. So, some of those are coming up too for anyone interested. So, they'll see all those on my website or as events on the Facebook page. 

[00:44:51] Lola: [00:44:51] Oh, 

[00:44:52] awesome. So that is great. And I'm so glad that I got to talk to you and learn more and help other people learn more about [00:45:00] meditating.

[00:45:00] I know a lot of moms, especially now with COVID and being home all the time. This was the time that I found out about meditating. So, I'm like, I need something to where it's like a minute to myself. I don't care what it is. So that's, COVID  brought me into meditating and I know a lot of my other friends also stumbled upon it

[00:45:20] then.  We need a few minutes and like wine, isn't going to help all the time. So, meditating, definitely a more healthy approach to de-stressing for the day. 

[00:45:32] Lisa: [00:45:32] Yeah, absolutely.  COVID has been tremendously stressful on women  and  I can't even, I'm grateful in many ways that my kids are older so they can at least do school on their own.

[00:45:41] I've just everyone I know with younger kids; it's just hats off. I don't know how we're doing it. We have borne the brunt of this pandemic, for sure. So, I'm so glad that you're covering something like meditation and that you found it for yourself too. I appreciate you having me 

[00:45:56] on. 

[00:45:57] Lola: [00:45:57] Thank you so much for

[00:45:59] all [00:46:00] of your advice and tips. I'm sure everyone. Is going to love having a resource and somewhere to go. Cause I try and  I try and share what I learned, but I know nothing about it. So, I'm like, I need an expert that can actually  tell everyone what they need to know. They can, she can answer the questions.

[00:46:17] Lisa: [00:46:17] Thank you for having me. 

[00:46:18] I appreciate it. 

[00:46:19] Lola: [00:46:19] Yes. Thank you. It was so great having you and you guys, I will put all of her information in the show notes, so that way you can find her. Learn how to meditate. We can learn how to do it together. And thank you so much again, Lisa, for being on the show today, that's it for today's show.

[00:46:36] Thank you again to Lisa Erickson for taking the time to sit down with us and talk all about meditation. I hope this episode was helpful in your mindfulness journey, and I will have all of Lisa's information in the show notes for you. As always, thank you so much for listening. If you're loving the episode  please leave me a written review on iTunes, Apple podcasts.

[00:46:57] So other people can find me. Screenshot the [00:47:00] show, share, and tag me on Instagram at the awkward mom stage. So, I know you love the episode and I'll reshare and shout you out on the podcast to show you some love. Today's a digital learning day y'all, so I got to go make sure my kids are at the computer like they should be.

[00:47:16] I'm sure my kindergartener has found some new thing to be interested in rather than zoom learning. Pray for me y'all. I hope you guys are having a great week. I will catch y'all in the next episode. Bye. Thanks for joining me this week on the awkward mom stage podcast. Make sure to visit our Instagram page where you can follow and find information on next week's show and any updates for the podcast.

[00:47:39] Make sure you subscribe to the show on iTunes, Apple podcast, Google podcast, Spotify, or wherever you listen to your favorite podcast shows. While you're at it, if you're enjoying the show, I'd appreciate it so much if you rate the show on iTunes or share this podcast with a friend, be sure to tune in next

[00:47:56] Wednesday for an all-new episode. I hope you're having an [00:48:00] awesome week happy hump day and always remember you're beautiful, Lola.